We got Sports!

Sup fool!

So every once in a while I like to ramble about sports, now would be that time... First OOO ESSS AHHH soccer, what more do I need to say? Am I the only one in the world who knew that Brazil was going to win at halftime? I am not the most serious soccer watcher, just mostly for qualifiers and other big games, but I feel like I have seen this so many times. Also I have accepted the fact that Brazil's players are better, but are they that much more in shape too? It looked like the Brazillians could have gone another 45 minutes, and our guys were getting ready to die at any minute. I mean it takes alot of work to give up 4 goals (and it WAS 4 goals) in a half. And how does Tim Howard win the Golden Glove (Golden Power Glove )? Dude gave up 9 goals in 5 games! That is not exactly getting it done. Sure he made some decent saves, but he also tried to keep a ball from going into the goal by backing up 4 feet into the goal (once again that WAS a goal).

Next the Cincinnati Reds are 2.5 games out. That's it. Somehow they FINALLY play in the worst league in baseball. The fact that it is late June and they do have a chance makes me happy. As much as we ripped them in June they could add a guy and put them over the top (even though I think the Cards just added out piece). So many people are saying how they are just waiting for the "real Reds" to show up and drop 10 in a row, but I think this IS the real Reds, they're a .500 club. What scares me is what happens when the Cubs or Cards rip off 25 of 30? I'm more worried of the other teams pulling away than I am of the Reds getting 15 games under .500.

And finally my Bearcats. What can I say? The city of Cincinnati is a better place when the Bearcats are winning basketball games and going to tournaments. This might be me drinking the kool-aid, but I think if they add Lance Stephenson...

Then they have a much better chance to win some games this year. I don't care if the guy has some dirt (pending legal issue and he may have accepted cash from Under Armour), he went to Lincoln High School with Jesus Shuttlesworth! Mick needs to roll the dice on him. If he doesn't land him and UC doesn't make the tournament I think Mick is done. But here is MY UC Basketball starting lineup, because it's never too early for November speculation. ***Note*** I have changed UC over to a 3 Guard set...
PG - Cashmere Wright
G - Deonta Vaughn
G - Lance Stephenson
F - Ibrihima Thomas (Dude is a 6' 11" SLASHER!!! He does not play Center, he handles the ball very well, in this lineup he would be an impact player)
F - Yancey Gates
That lineup makes the tournament, and is a top 25 team all year hands down. If Stephenson signs I will be a happy boy, and we will finally get to see how good of a coach Mick is. Oh yeah and don't forget about Biggie McClain... oh wait... yeah nevermind you can forget about Biggie.

Boom...

The Camping Ramp Jump of Death - Watch more Funny Videos
Step 1 of hitting a ramp, don’t hit the ramp…with your face.


Cancelled WoW Account Meltdown - Watch more Funny Videos
So this is what happens when you cancel a nerd’s World of Warcraft account? My only question… why does he have those fancy boxers on if no girl is ever going to see them? Wait, did he just try to put a remote in his butt?


Dunk Almost Takes Kids Head Off - Watch more Funny Videos
How he’s not dead I have no idea.


Jake The Snake. Oh how the mighty have fallen… At least he’s still got Damian, it’s the same snake right?


Awesome. Instead of charging them, they need to make him eat the rest of the brownies.


Maybe my favorite sketch, I dunno.

Father's Day...

I don't know what this picture has to do with Father's Day, but I love it!

So yesterday was a day that I have been looking forward to for a few months since the boy arrived. My first Father’s Day was overall successful. My day started with what has come to be my favorite part of any weekend. When Riley wakes up, Lindsey goes and gets him out of his crib and we play with him in bed for 20 minutes or so. It only took my wife 4 years to figure out that I like to lie in bed for a half hour or so when I wake up, it took my son less than 3 months! He likes to play in the morning so it’s fun to make him kick his legs and tickle him and make him laugh. So far being a dad has been much cooler than I could have ever expected, I often find myself thinking about seeing him when I get home from work and how great that will be.

So that said, my son got me a gift card to Bass Pro Shops for Father’s Day. That is what I asked for, so I know that he is a good listener. My reasoning for the gift card to the Redneck Store was pretty simple… Every year I declare that this is the year that I start fishing again (I haven’t fished since I was 15). Problem is, I don’t have a fishing pole anymore. So I figured that if I am going to start fishing more then I need to buy a pole and some gear. So in the near future (before we go to Norris Lake in July) I will be making a trip to Bass Pro to stock up on all of the necessities.

Another thing that I need to get before Norris lake is THE BULLET !!! There is no way in hell I’m getting in that inflatable coffin again, but I’m sure I can coax my brother’s in law (sp?) to jump in that thing by calling them girls! Needless to say I am bringing the Vicodin and muscle relaxers this year just in case, in fact after Brian’s wipe out I think I will make those medications a staple for all future boat trips. Which brings me to my next question… Nick when is the next boat trip? Are you gonna make us call your pops and ask him? Hook us up! I’ve been doing 2-3 crunches a week for the past week and a half to strengthen my back, I’m good!
Also Saturday knight before The Dunner, J, and I got a contact high at 311 we hit up FatBurger. Considering that it is ½ mile from my work and has been open for 10 months it is a shame that it took me this long to make my maiden voyage. It was worth the wait though. And considering that I have now visited two of the more decorated burger chains in the last 2 weeks here is a quick review…

Five Guys (DC/Ballstimore Area) Great Burger! It almost seemed as though the cheese was impregnated (that’s right I said it) into the meat and then cooked, that part was great! The lettuce tomato, jalaps and other toppings were ok, but they were almost lost by the burger itself.

FatBurger (Nati) Also Great Burger! It was well put together and on this occasion the toppings and bun stole the show! Not to say that the meat wasn’t good, but the toppings were great! I love shredded lettuce and all the other stuff on the burger!

My consensus… Go to both places, take a Five Guys (cheese impregnated) burger and throw it on a FatBurger bun and toppings, you just may have the greatest cheeseburger EVER!!!

Welcome Back to Me!

Just found me a new lawyer!

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Because we all love kids singing Journey… If only these kids realized that they were singing a classic.


Pool Jump Failure - Watch more Funny Videos
Dude might need some dentures!


Backflip to Teeter Totter Nutshot - Watch more Funny Videos
Wow what a moron, does he not know that the top of a ladder is NOT A STEP!!! IDIOT!


So since I had to post Laser Cats last week, I decided to just go back to SNL clips, and since this was the sketch most repeated last weekend… I give you Cork Soakers! Props to Heratio Sans for holding it together for an ENTIRE sketch. This video reminds me... Hey remember when Janet Jackson was hot???

It's FRIDAY!!! (Well for me it is) Have fun at work SUCKERS!

Painful Slap Prank In Classroom - Watch more Funny Videos
I have a few questions. 1) A SLAP really??? And 2) Why did you take your shirt off to slap a guy?


Funny Hammer Pants Flash Mob - Watch more Funny Videos
I’ve just learned of the craze that is the “Flash Mob” and I must confess… I LOVE IT!!! Here is my notice, if you are organizing a flash mob, I want in! (FYI, I can’t dance).


Unreal Alley-Oop - Watch more Action Sports Videos
This is your boy “Chocolate Milk” from And1 Mix Tape Vol. 634… OOOOOHHHHHHH BABAY!!!


EMBED-Painful BMX Faceplant - Watch more free videos
Well at least he had his helmet on!


Why do Asians always feel the need to be better than everyone else, AT EVERYTHING! And why do Japanese TV show hosts always dress crazy?


Laser Cats! (sorry I’m out of Digital Shorts)

Enjoy 'em this week, I'm off next week!

OK before I get to the videos let me show you this picture of Lance Armstrong's new son! I normally do not say that babies are ugly, but yikes! That kid is hideous, It looks like its about to eat me!

Now, the videos.

Bruno Movie Trailer

If you only see one movie this summer (ignore Simon’s list) let it be…BRUNO!!!!

Triumph at Star Wars ep2 Premier

Maybe the best Triumph ever. If you have 10 minutes then you need to watch!


Man I wish their Beer didn’t taste like piss! I would definitely buy it because of this commercial!


Soccer Slide Tackle Breaks Player's Leg - Watch more Funny Videos
Snizzapp!


Coach Knocked Out by Line Drive - Watch more Funny Videos
This video brings up a few points. 1) Coach pitch is AWESOME! 2) Grown (overweight) men (DickPole and Charlie Manuel) should not wear baseball uniforms. And 3) MIDDLE’S OPEN!!!


Thanks Hulu!

Monday.

Little Kid Owned by Flying RC Car - Watch more Funny Videos
That's either an RC Car or a GIANT BABY!


Darren Glass. Respond to this!!!


Wow. Even Nitro Circus couldn't do that!


EMBED-Painful Airbag-Powered Nutshot - Watch more free videos
Owww.


No music, but still great.